A remix to Oliver Tree’s ‘Cash Machine’ came out last year, courtesy of moombahton legend Dillon Francis, and I’ve been bumpin this track way too much. Contrary to my years spent chasing good headphones, rebelling against the removal of the 3.5mm jack, yet eventually shifting to in-ear buds for cycling, there’s an important message. Yes indeed, at its pop-techno core is the truth we need to face: How far will we push the bounds of material consumerism in search of inner happiness?
A Sabotaged Sabbatical
In early 2018, I left full-time employment in search of adventure on a 2004 Honda VFR800. Up to this point, the little free time from 50+ hour work weeks in the Bay Area was grasped by the handlebars. When not traveling to see my partner in Seattle, my heart found bliss exploring freely on two wheels new hiking trails, distant beaches, national parks, riding to the 2017 Eclipse, Burning Man, and all the time avoiding traffic and parking chaos. Over the years I had built up an excellent ‘load-out’ that only needed a few ROKstraps and minimal planning.
April 12th marked the day to start my moto trip to Baja, stopping at Corbin for a “new” seat, refurbishing the beat-up 13-year old saddle. That Friday I was so far a long my adventure mentally, I neglected to be focused in the present. A curve just south of Pismo Beach reminded me of this reality as I crashed, totaling my beloved ‘Wildcat’, carefully restored to “like-new but still stickered out” state; breaking my neck and severely injuring the left hand in the process. Woof, what a way to end this leave-of-absence, years in the making, not to mention a serious blow to the ego! Lucky and thankful to be alive, I began my true journey inward…
‘Recovery’ was easy, not afraid to push the bounds of healing, I said no to the masking affects of pain killers, yes to the calming veil of CBD, and was spiritually uplifted by amazing friends and family. Mentally, I was silently devastated, even more so when faced with the medical insurance administrative hell. Truth is, I had no other people to care for than myself – something I would realize was pivotal (aka a privilege) in being able to tackle so many collateral challenges, nevermind the trip itself. At first, I struggled to accept this had actually all happened. But through physical therapy and meditation, a sense peace and contentment not before experienced was found. That is, until I opened up my work email to check in with my employer. Sabbatical over indeed!
Challenging Workplace Traditionalism
First order of business was taking advantage of the part-time work arrangement I had negotiated prior to leaving. You see, as an engineer making 2.4x the living wage the year prior, I had saved some money for travel, yet, not enough to be paying Oakland living expenses (Alameda County est. at $45,520/yr). My future was uncertain. Yet, a large project I supported before Baja moved closer into construction. I stepped into a new role to help our team, generating money and opening the possibility of remote work. Moving from The Bay for The PNW to reunite with Sierra had been a serious thought, yet leaving all my connections still seemed crazy. However, this whole moto incident had meaning, and the universe was telling me something (slow down!). At five weeks post-crash, I sold my other beloved mechanical admiration ‘Slovo’ (a fully-built 2011 Volvo C30), sublet my room for the summer, packed a tote & bag to check onto the plane and “moved” to Seattle. Thanks mom, for the healing week you spent with me before this. Before one judges someone for their adverse situation (and outcome), it should be considered they may not have been as fortunate to have an amazing loving family to get them through it…
With Sierra near again, I strangely had little reluctance in my decision to move. Upon arrival, I took advantage of nature, crushing the Little Si trail seven weeks post-crash, each drop of sweat adhering to my neckbrace removing with it anger, regret, disappointment. Every step upwards I left behind a desire for all my things still back in Oakland, profoundly joyous that I was WALKING. As a motorcycle guy, I respect statistical truth of being left impaired and know too many cherished souls that probability had swept from us. I had never before felt spiritual; however, being free from all my stuff and projects and work commitments let the universe speak to me in strange ways.
Working a bit, but still mostly healing, I explored Ballard during the day, the Locks being a special place of healing, and befriended many of the local hobos. At this point, the neighborhood’s working class houseless individuals were in many cases, still working, or back from an ocean fishing voyages. Finding recent rent hikes too expensive (from hipsters like me moving there), they turned to their boats, vans, tents, etc. I learned so much from these guys, shared lunch with them, tried to procure supplies when needed – but mostly just listened and shared stories. Wow, I completely forgot about my neckbrace, and as it would turn out, it was how they all recognized me apart from the other gentrifiers! It was eye opening to get a glimpse of their life, the little they had, yet remaining so cheerful with a bit of engagement and somewhere safe to call home. By August, my neck brace was off. And following a two month roadtrip around the States to Ohio, Sierra & I had fully transferred life from Oakland and moved in together; all was good. Although, I will omit the horrific car accident we were involved with while returning home. Rest assured, our focus was truly on living, loving, and back to working towards our next place of adventuring…
Car Guy with no Car; Motorcyclist with no Moto?!
Why all this backstory? Well, I hope to share an important lesson without ya’ll suffering two motorcycle accidents and a car crash to internalize it. I love cars and modding mechanical things; to-date, owning a MKVI VW GTI, Ford Focus ST, Slovo, six motorcycles, and once spending all my earned income over the course of 30 straight 10-hr days on (dope) custom rims and a Buell 1125R. Was I stupid, or just underpaid‽ Being that two of the cars were purchased new, one sold only after a year (the Focus ST), that third motorcycle was totaled after just four months (NOT my fault), and countless money was spent on tuning/accessories/tickets – young and dumb is the answer! I did learn to not buy new, going a year without a car to save and search for a worthy used choice. However, after my mishap, I was for the first time, able to “see” myself owning something, envisioning how that would be; and moving on. YouTube was an amazing resource, with some truly engaging reviews and lots of rich people bringing viewers along for ‘the ride’ (of having lots of expendable income). I could save the migraine of maintenance, stress over surprise scratches, frustration over fixes, and all the hours spent toying. That’s not to say I don’t still daydream up some revolutionary builds. No, I had instead freed myself from the ‘cost’ of my hobby, while still enjoying it remotely.
What really changed in shedding a fancy car addiction was my financial bottom line, a conservative fixed-cost estimate of $8,000/year. The bigger impact came as a surprise, being no longer motived to OWN everything cool, and instead, simply appreciating it exists. Maybe one day, if it was truly special, and still had meaning come that day, I could buy it!
If society won’t grant equality or address the countless urban inequities, at least you can buy the image of it!
For now, what should I do with all this time and the freedom from consumerism’s financial handcuffs?
A realization that trying to ‘Keep up with the Jonses’ only empowers The Man…
The mental paradigm shift upon acknowledging the negative effects of buying into disposable trends, overt material accumulation, or the patriarchy origins of ownership itself?!
Now, I fully acknowledge my privilege of having such financial ability to begin with. And this must be addressed. After all, when faced with adverse family conditions, systemic poverty, discrimination, oppression; consumerism and acquisition of material things may be the only way to live amidst impossible odds of achieving the American Dream. If society won’t grant you equality or address the countless urban inequities, at least you can buy the image of it! But my altruistic message isn’t directed at under-served, marginalized communities – it is at those with the means of being free from such disparity: the choices they can make to help transform our extractive & exploitative system through finding compassion and building community…
Community Volunteerism.
Personal Adventurism.
Material Expressionism.
The final chapter ironically began with a purchase. “Meeko” was an ugly motorcycle, not sporty, not quite rugged, but certainly capable. The previous owner was a rad dad who responsibly sold this 2013 Suzuki DL650 upon the birth of two boys, following his trip to Alaska. Friends and family were not happy with me, but those close to addicts rarely are. I justified another motorcycle with the fact that one can get equally injured downhill mountain biking, the alternate vice…Having this mobility option was worth the $5,200 + $24/month insurance. Public transportation options were excellent but couldn’t get me everywhere. Lyft became a hefty additive cost, and my single-speed cycle wasn’t nearly as capable as this 66-hp, 48-mpg, soon-to-be ADV legend. I don’t advocate everyone gets a motorcycle, but there’s a reason why so many exist in developing countries: they’re affordable personal transportation alternatives!
By this time, I had began volunteering with numerous Seattle non-profit groups, while going to as many as three professional networking events each week. I was learning so much from both, and at essentially no cost besides my time. The rewarding internal and external value of volunteering is priceless; nothing short of fulfilling. Free time became more about what I could give, rather than what I could get. If you haven’t yet, try community volunteerism. Meet neighbors, hear about their lives, talk through problems, network, and leave with a lasting feeling that you have created something. Have children? Bring them too! They seemed to be having a pretty fun time digging up invasive plants, learning how houses are built, seeing the power of community united. To my surprise, I enjoyed talking to many about engineering and educational pathways so much, it is now one of our programs!
Free time became more about what I could give, rather than what I could get.
Working part-time 20-40 hours per week was necessary to generate income, eventually becoming my apartment’s Super to lower rent. My experiences with those “Ballard bums” opened my heart, itself motivation for community action, and, combined with industry shortcomings motivated me to begin Utility². I organized Infrastructure Week 2019 in May, one of the most holistic learning experiences of my life…My eyes remained set between Meeko’s handlebars though…One way or another my sabbatical was coming! I saved for about eight months, had an intense hiking routine, and this time, prepared myself mentally for solitude. I gave due notice to my employer and began my adventurous ride north on June 4, 12,019. If spending 51 of 55 days in a tent traveling to the two most northern places of the Americas, with nothing more than a packed motorcycle interests you, be sure to check out #meekotothenorth where I discuss #adventurism in much greater detail! Two months with no deodorant, I returned to Ballard changed considerably. (The trip included reading Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance with interesting, if not critical perspectives on how we spend our time doing things)
While my unibrow was likely the most noticeable change to others, the return to my apartment was considerably more shocking to me. I will never ever forget the shear anxiety I felt walking inside, seeing all our ‘things’ – opening my closet for the first time and seeing way too many options! Up to this point, I had given away a shirt, been given a jacket, repaired lots of gear, and otherwise traveled perfectly light. This was a Modernity system shock indeed…but not to fret, because three days later I flew to meet Sierra in Antigua (See Gringo in Guatemala: A Guide to Get Guat’ed).
Deep breathes here. Nobody backpacks through developing nations and returns with a positive view of disposable products. And depending on your perspective of classism, the aspirations for those throughout the societal spectrum towards a westernized approach to economy show little evidence of reduced material consumption or adhering to the waste hierarchy. My views of consumerism expanded in that, for so many living in poverty, it is often they only way of life. The system’s economics hold the promise of a better future, and in many ways, a healthier existence for communities altogether. We can look at the multifaceted benefits in mass adoption of electric cooking (replacing wood burning) and acquisition of modern appliances. Yet, I still can’t help but wonder how nearly all societies have been transformed to adopt the same buy/own/sell-discard philosophy. I have serious concern about the fate of Earth’s final remote communities, who’s lifestyle, culture, and environment will be forever changed with all that which comes with westernized Modernity…and the addiction of consuming for convenience.
So, what did these experiences cost?
Volunteering, in its many forms, I spent no less than 15 hours on average, in combination with 20-40 hours of paid work per week, for about two years. This is a significant amount of time, but, you can find equal benefit taking an afternoon every month or so to serve your community. One of the best may be simply picking up trash on a Community Cleanup day, an excellent way to meet neighbors and inspire contagious environmental stewardship in the process!
Traveling? I did eventually make it to Baja, passing that same curve 18 months later, with a much different perspective on that event. For reference, two months and 9,000 miles motorcycling around northern North America was $5,000 with all expenses, expendables, and of course, the beers. Five weeks backpacking around Central America was around $2,000. A six week trip from Seattle to Baja and back was easily less than $2,000…Our more recent three week trip to Costa Rica was $3,000 per person. All less than 24 months of newish car ownership, with Meeko’s cost included…zero regrets not chasing my next project car (rally-ready VW MKV R32 ‘SafaRi32’).
Do I have a level of privilege for these experiences and the views I hold?
Undoubtedly. A privilege which has materialized my supreme concern for what the Earth may look like after billions more join the ranks of the American Consumer, with the loss of biodiversity, industrialized critical rainforests, and diluted cultural identity that may occur in the process (here’s a great discussion).
It is important to note that most of what I needed for these experiences was part of my existing wardrobe, with very few exceptions to some specialized camping gear – much of it military surplus. And to my critics, I am shedding hypocrisies through ‘material expressionism’ that is worn and functional. I still wear the same clothes from those trips: my red Patagucci flannel present in most pictures since 2018, black & grey Under Armour t-shirts no longer have their logos, my Lowa boots are waxed/glued to the maximum, Crocs scuffed to the point of physical discomfort, my Mammut rain jacket has kept me dry thousands of miles under a tattered/haphazardly-sewn riding jacket and through five countries before it was stolen – onward to shelter another. The holes in my Kuhl jeans from the first ‘Baja mishap’ have amateur-level sewing, I only recently discarded all those holey wool socks (and underwear), my Hydroflask looks adamantly against single-use (stain-LESS), my favorite watch (G-Shock of course) was found abandoned in a box on the side of the road, I’m still looking for a replacement for the free Gregory hat or the OBEY hiking cap that’s overtly faded/stained, and Sierra is so sick of my purple Nike Dryfit tee she tried to hide it in hopes I’d forget about it (HA!). I still wear my COVID-ridden purple bandana while riding Meeko, who has so many scars that if anyone questions her capability, they are unworthy to find out. I could replace these and many other things, but with shared experiences, they have adopted a personality of their own – and nobody can tell me nothing to the contrary. Besides, it wasn’t that long ago in the Human Era where WE DIDN’T HAVE VERY MANY OUTFITS!
Recently, Sierra did caution me that my wardrobe was becoming ‘dated’; that my fashion was more BRO than PROFESSIONAL ENGINEER. OK…So I went to the mall for the first time in, well……a long time, and picked up a slick pair of Nike sneakers. This made me really happy, and compliments from random strangers even more. I found the absolute PERFECT color purple slacks at Ross, and spent the savings at Bonobos, where they have “affordable” tailor-fit dress shirts. Now I can be fresh when its that time; however, I will keep wearing my green H&M shorts on every hike until those things evaporate from all the oil stains! Unless of course its raining; then its time for my LRG board shorts purchased when I first moved to California. My point is, using what you have until its no longer useable is one small step for empowering the consumer. Let’s make that cool again.
At the end of the day, being successful in our image-centric system relies equally on expressionism, as it does on one’s ability to be a consumer.
And being a consumer is where many of us find happiness.
Happiness & Economy built upon Branding, Image, New Expressionism.
Thinking back to my high school days in a rural town, I was laughed at for my fresh sneakers, crisp patterned button-ups, and flashy color palette. That made things easy: I wore metal band tee’s and gym shorts aligned with my peer group. However, for so many youths in cities, it seems building the consumer habit is not only trendy, but essential to be cool. While decades of fashion has created no shortage of thrift shop vintage finds (i.e. circular economy, yay!), the importance of IMAGE remains eternal to us. The idea of branding has been instilled, somehow, embedded into our identify! I can’t even tell you how this happened for my generation (born in 1987), being that there was no social media, internet influencer advertising, and really just super tacky TV commercials. I remember how hot Old Navy’s Tech Vests were, and how late I was to the game; by my first purchase, they were already too nerdy for the cool kids – along with my zip-off pants (…but they’re back now). Abercrombie & Fitch, Hollister, American Eagle, Victoria’s Secret – brands and smells I will never forget.
We are surrounded by branding. In music, on billboards (physical & digital), on Instagram, and more obvious than ever, in movies & TV shows. And I can’t help but to point out the elephant in the underserved diverse community: branding replacing cultural identity through mimicry of material trends. A deliberate attempt by The System to convince us that happiness is in commoditizing our image, all with the intent to propagate Their Economy. Does this in any way uplift our community?
This trend of new expressionism continues beyond adolescence, often unencumbered, even in dire financial conditions. I’ve seen it, you’ve seen it, and we’ve all likely experienced it. In the void of happiness and fulfillment, we seek the acquisition of material goods. At peak stress we seek the easiest form of therapy: shopping. In the realization of something slightly easier, we consume the convenience.
The pandemic has exasperated these trends, and worse. Look at the recent online shopping […shipping] trends; also looking at you ‘Zon! There is a tremendous cost to our endless pursuit of products – and not just for our bank accounts or credit card statements. The Earth is giving all it can, and then some, so that we can have the Apple iPhone 27. Seriously though, is it reasonable to expect (and purchase) a new iPhone every year!? Is this even a sane approach to innovation??(!!) I just replaced the battery in my iPhone 7+, purchased used after my 3-y/o Android ceased function in middle-of-nowhere Alaska. As it turns out, the lack of a cell phone means more potential for in-personal connections…What my banter is trying to convey is,
We must fight back, all of us, and make heroic statements in our consumer choices…
MODERNITY ≠ NEW
It may very well be the case that Modernity is shifting towards avoiding ‘new’ products altogether, and instead, looking at refurbished or gently used options which suit our desires. Take my choice money pit: cars & motorcycles. Will I ever buy a new car again? Not likely. A motorcycle? LOL! And I am not alone. Just look at the rising price of used vehicles, especially certain models actually worth their weight in Earth’s precious resources. It can be more cost-effective, a more engaging product, and in many cases, facilitate learning life skills! This applies to sporting goods, tools, furniture, appliances, building materials, many electronics, and apparel, especially with all those subscription boxes accumulating on hangers…After all, most products being made today are constructed of robust materials that can outlive entire generations (for better or worse). Instead of NEW, we can choose REUSE and REPAIR.
My argument summarized with one question: What helps build our sense of community more?
– A hasty “BUY NOW” 1-click purchase with rushed shipping, with all its packaged carbon-footprint, megacorporation empowering, labor exploiting, cheap price ; or
– Uncovering a previously loved gem, meeting someone new for the exchange, bargaining a fair price, and placing money in the hands of a fellow Human, while leaving the delivery/packaging for something else.
You get the point? Non-essential Shopping should be engaging and hopefully come with something more than just a quick purchase. After all, most of these products we buy are anything but ‘quick manufacturing’, considering the environmental impact and cheap labor required to land at your doorstep. And this one is especially important: if a new product breaks or fails prematurely, please hold the manufacturer accountable – DO NOT simply go and buy a new one! As ‘cheap’ becomes increasingly common to convince us “We need it!”, consumers must demand quality and manufacturer ownership, writing reviews both positive and negative. Think of it this way: it takes >95% of the same resources to make crap, as it does to make quality.
Looking for something? Need to get your shopping fix? Check Craigslist (crazy good resource for used tools, project/building materials, literally everything and anything…), eBay (yes, it is still a website!), your local thrift store (they have LOTS of kitchen goods, just avoid anything Teflon), and hop aboard your neighborhood ‘Buy Nothing’ group or Marketplace (one of the few positive outcomes of Facebook).
But remember, the best option may be getting back into your community, shopping at truly local brick & mortar merchants, walking the grocery isles again, visiting farmers markets, swap meet & mercaditos, and supporting food trucks. Let’s not forget to spare some time to talk with those “homeless folk looking for handouts”; you’d be surprised to learn conversation is often more appreciated than tossing them a quick dollar and moving on. And with time, as I did, you may find such compassion more fulfilling than anything filling your shopping cart 😊
So we’ve sliced through the tape, hastily inspected the marketing, unwrapped the packaging, and opened up Pandora’s box. What next? Anything besides ‘BUY NOW!’
Things to do instead of ‘automatic’ shopping:
- Go for a walk, hike, run, swim, or find yourself a playground with a swing set (then get on that swing!). Try a new active-lifestyle interest, searching second-hand before making a large investment into something used only a few times (bicycle, kayak, stand-up paddle board, etc.).
- Visit or call friends, distant family members, connect with your culture/heritage and own it.
- Volunteer in your community or another neighborhood. Google is your friend in finding local organizers, but message us if you need help!
- Flex those creativity skills us Humans are so good at! Music, cooking, art, writing (a letter to family member), or…
- Find a project that rejuvenates or restores something to offset a new product, or something that may be otherwise landfilled – browse the Craigslist Free section for plenty of ideas…Need tools? Search for local tool libraries or put an ‘ask’ out into the social media neighborhood groups as an alternative to buying something you may use once (looking at you $95 chain breaker tool…)
- Start a garden and grow things you may otherwise need to buy – believe me, it takes up all those hours otherwise spent doom scrolling. Our beautiful 2’x8’ raised bed was designed/built entirely of free & scrap wood, with the only cost being screws and soils from the local composting facility (>$80 in total).
- Adopt a new hobby or skill that also respects Earth’s resources. Just don’t decide to change your oil for the first time without the proper cleanup and disposal supplies ready.
- Learn something new. We live in confusing, conflicting times; but fortunately, there’s no shortage of free or donation-based virtual sessions these days hosted by subject-matter experts advocating for awareness of their work!
Most importantly: Plan an epic adventure and escape our ingrained consumer behaviors! Trust me, you can do it; all those tiny needless purchases avoided add up (as does the interest averted). Be a legend, use what you already have, and let creativity bring self-inspiration. Of course, any excursion will require consumption; so make it intentional, engaging, fulfilling, so that when you return, you can rock that tent-tape repaired jacket, and all its taco grease with pride – everyday reminding you of your legendary journey.
Thanks for reading. I hope my rant came with some inspiration to RETHINK being a reflective vs automatic consumer. After all, it will be up to us to help avert the spread of unsustainable consumption…
And to send you off, here’s that favorite song of mine…
Robert writes to share his experiences and observations through a lens of curiosity and questioning; why are so many places on Earth facing analogous challenges? how do we leverage nature’s regenerative mechanisms to craft more robust, equitable solutions? Let’s rethink infrastructure, our perception of Modernity, and collaboratively build for tomorrow.
