Gringo in Guatemala: A Guide to Get Guat’ed

I tightened my straps, completed a final walk-around, and left Seattle on June 4th to begin #meekotothenorth ; 51 days and 9,000 miles later, I had my first beer being back in Seattle. With my seasoned DL650 (aka meeko) properly stored, covered up, and panniers unpacked, I began re-packing to head south; questioning the need for anything more than the two outfits that got me through soo much…4 days later I was en route with my backpack to meet Sierra in Antigua, ready to test my Spanish, experience a new country, and eat my heart out.

Rewinding several months previous, Sierra indicates that she intends to spend her summer in Guatemala; ignoring a STRONG travel advisory issued by The Administration, who had just made significant efforts to further destabilize the region by pulling humanitarian aid and waging a multinational border war. Her surprise to me began a series of events leading to this moment, where I am forced to choose which hat to take as I leave the apartment once more. Don’t worry, I made the correct choice!
This is a brief story of #robandsierragetguated, I hope you enjoy!

Gringo in Guatemala: A Guide to Get Guat’ed — Chicken Bus glory. Pimp My Ride, eat your heart out…

She had already been in country for about five-ish weeks, first arriving in Guatemala City to visit her father’s dad and married-in Guatemalan grandmother; now spending time in Antigua to take Spanish lessons, among so many other authentic experiences. There had not been an ounce of preparation for this trip on my end besides washing the clothes from worn in Alaska. Sure, I told myself I’d use Duolingo while on my moto adventure, but my phone didn’t work and brushing up on Spanish was the last thing on my mind. I knew from Sierra that it would be humid, its rains often, there would be mosquitos, and Antigua was an established tourist destination, most other things could be figured out once there – easy. I land at the airport, making it through customs no issue, quickly finding a food cart outside the airport, and finding a taxi to Antigua without even asking!
(I’m a tall white guy, a prime customer; they already know where I’m going)
The taxi driver is stoked to help me get comfortable with conversational Spanish. The other two passengers have no idea what we’re saying…hmm. We both have Suzuki moto’s, both have been in bad accidents, he has a family with two boys, and there is a BIG election happening in Guatemala two weeks from now. A bumpy, erratic 45-minute drive and we’re here!

Antigua – You Already Know!

If you haven’t heard about Antigua, then follow our example and come visit. Search online for the details if you so desire. Other than my personal feelings of this place being built by foreign invaders, everything is rad! Surrounded by volcanoes and jungle, one couldn’t ask for a cooler Hispanic colonial city, with buildings all limited to no more than a few stories. Many of them reduced to rubble, re-built (even if partially), due to reoccurrence of earthquakes and volcanic activity. Accommodations are plentiful and would recommend reserving something easy for the first 2-3 days, then walking around, meeting people, and finding a longer-term stay that way. It is a challenge to find a truly locally-owned establishment; but they do exist! Be sure to stop in and say hi to CA Travelers, and ask Faris for a recommendation…she will not steer you wrong – (more on that later).

The surrounding pueblos are a special experience for those seeking to escape the tourism-feel of Antigua; just remember that you are in someone else’s hometown and be respectful of their space! As for visiting those towns, a Chicken Bus ride is a must. Sure Uber is cool and easy, but nothing is quite like the CB experience…plus at about $0.25 per rider, you can afford to give the bag dude propinas!

We visited Sierra’s uncle, a well-known local musician who has called San Juan del Obispo home for over a decade. He has recently earned fame baking brownies (regular American-style brownies) for, not just the children, but all his neighbors. We learned this walking back to his place late night; seeing two potentially risky figures waiting for us at the end of his street…
”Te quieres brownies?” says Joe.
The shadowy men light up with excitement, as if knowing at some point, he would return home to give them the delicious treat! Hilarious and heartwarming. Turns out, the guys own the motorcycle shop across from his place and needless to say, a tour of their garage was in order the next day!

Oh, and if you want the best desayuno tradicional (y mas) while in town, visit Restaurante La Concina del Obispo (abierto sábado y domingo solomente!).

Here are my Antigua take-aways:

If your gringo self decides to call Antigua (or any foreign place) home, be sure to bring something to contribute to the community – even if it is just brownies!

Eat all the food. This is not Mexican food, it is truly unique to Guatemala: Pepián (and other caldos), street empanadas, rellenitos, and LOTS of super thick masa tortillas and beans. Americans, you will need some salt…

Drink all the coffee; paired with cacao and the best pastries from panaderías! No, I do not have a favorite – that decision requires too much brain processing…Oh, I should mention that you can also just go straight to drinking cacao, delicious unadulterated hot chocolate.

Seek out the local watering holes, sharing some Gallo’s with fellow tourists, listening to great music, and hopefully speaking some Spanish. Be mindful of your surroundings, and do not become a statistic that our government uses to slander this amazing place (i.e. get drunk, stay out too late, stumble home…).

Antigua is a mecca for trinkets, textiles, and trading. There are plenty of items you can buy directly from families who travel great distances to sell their goods (or other family’s goods). Why support a large, likely Hispanic or internationally owned business (i.e. has a dedicated building), when you can buy the same thing direct from a family! This is not to say you can’t support both, but at least visit the markets and street venders before you get sucked into the boutique bullshit. Just say’n…

SAY NO TO SINGLE-USE ANYTHING!
Hands down, plastic bottles and bags were the numero uno of #litterspotting. If you need to purchase a plastic, single-use water bottle, buy a larger size (+1L), with a cap and resilient packaging, so that you can continue to re-use it until it begs you to return in to a recycling receptacle. Check out ecofiltro and how widespread they’ve become in Guat’…seriously reducing the need to buy ‘bottled’ water.

Throw away your garbage responsibly, understanding the long, complex, journey that trash can take on its way to rubbish heaven. Small baggies? Micro trash? Consolidate it into a closable container before tossing it so the wind or a spill doesn’t impede its journey to “final disposal”.

Be a #humbletourist and help pick up some trash you will encounter when strolling along Antigua’s many calles – you may find some interesting things you can blog about!

And lastly, this concept of ‘getting Guated’…
On numerous occasions, on many adventures, we’ve chosen to ask around for places to eat/drink rather than refer to the internet or guides. Most commonly, we are pointed to the most Westernized attempt to ‘hipster’. In Antigua, this thing happens where you sort of get conned; tricked into thinking you’re getting something special or extra authentic. Unless the recommendation came from a seasoned tourist or local amigo you’ve made, DO NOT FALL FOR IT! I still remember spending an equivalents week’s worth on a very mediocre Italian meal – my bad for eating pasta in Antigua lol.

Fulfilling A Childhood Dream: Volcán Acatenango

Remember CA Travelers? Sign up for their overnight trip to fulfill your childhood dreams of seeing lava spewed hundreds of feet into the air, losing sleep out of fear that the volcano may suddenly explode for reals; just be prepared for the intense climb. I REPEAT, BE PREPARED! This includes some guidelines, but more importantly, rules, that if you choose to ignore, please return to your home country and stay there…

It is going to be a difficult hike. Being that I just returned from Alaska, crushing dozens of tough, steep hikes, it was the ground conditions which posed the challenge. Luckily, I was prepared and had BOOTS. Don’t rely on half-worn tennis shoes, you’ll sprain your ankle 15 minutes into the ascent. We actually repaired someone’s ‘barely-held-together boots’ with duct tape Sierra brought (super clutch bae!). In my opinion, everyone who travels abroad should come prepared with one good pair of hiking shoes/boots, or be ready to buy them.

It will begin hot, and end very, very cold at the summit (and overnight stay). If you choose CA Travelers, they hook it up with gear; albeit, not the best – which makes it kind of fun picking out which donated, over-sized jacket you’ll pack away.

Food may or may not be provided, or something in between. Don’t complain about quality, quantity please…you are a Human being with a hundred thousand year’s evolution. A Cliff bar can hold you over long enough, so you don’t have to show your privilege. And if you are concerned, plan on bringing your own grub! (and bringing it out too.)

Now for the rules:

BE PREPARED TO CARRY YOUR OWN BACKPACK or accept the paid help!
We had 2 people in our group that, at 15 and 45 minutes into the hike, decided their packs were too heavy. Fortunately, a local teenager was ready to carry one of the bags for a modest price; the other person’s pack, our guide and myself took turns carrying all the way up (2 packs, plus water). Please, do not be that person – just accept the help in the beginning if you are not used to hiking with a pack!

PACK IN / PACK OUT – OR GTFO.
Halfway up, we caught up to another group, where some guy was livid, asking around if anyone “spoke their language”, while waving his empty water bottle. Surprised that I was one of two people in two tour groups that spoke Spanish, I asked what the deal was…
“Can you ask our guide if he can put this bottle in his pack?!”
My lecture to him was brief, and hopefully impactful. I filled up my backpack two times up, and one time down, with other people’s trash. If you bring a disposable water bottle, it better be in your pack when you get back on the bus to Antigua; otherwise, please refrain from visiting nature until you are prepared to do so ethically. The same goes for ANY waste you generate along the way, including toilet paper that can easily be placed in a zip-lock bag!

Sorry, that was harsh, but it had to be said. For the sake of future generations visiting this place in the same conditions we were able to.

Ending on a positive note, camping overnight with multiple guides was such an amazing experience. Learning about Edelso and his life, somewhat limited by MY language deficiency, was inspiration to continue giving blind compassion to our Human neighbors across the globe. Try it out, and see what new perspectives great your heart and mind. Thanks Faris and CA Travelers for one of the greatest experiences in this life!

Upon returning to Antigua, we rested a few days before our next adventure to Lake Atitlán. This marvelous wonder deserved its own post…check it out here…

A Crazy Ride to Semuc Champey

A quick search for this place, and the common questions are hilarious…
‘Is Semuc Champey Worth It’
‘Why is Semuc Champey Important’
We spoke with many along our journey and knew immediately it was a must-experience place; in the jungles outside the ‘city’ of Lanquin and far drive from Antigua in the northern country. Along that route, it was surprising to see how much land had been developed into commercial-scale farmland, only learning later how big an issue this was for indigenous people’s and the natural ecosystem. Check out the work being done by groups like Agros and ProPetén to build equity into these farms, and help reclaim land taken from indigenous Maya!

I’ll keep it short – visit this place if you can abide by the same rules as Acatenango.

Do not bring anything here which you do not take out with you.

It was amazing seeing the limestone formations with surreal teal water, to feel like a terrified child in the dark of caves, and have an entire waterfall paradise to ourselves for an hour!
It was beyond frustrating to see how much plastic trash has been brought to, and dumped in the middle of the jungle – a place which is already facing enough Human impact from deforestation for development and agriculture. I fully recognize that me simply going here is contributing to these issues, and I struggle with it every time I visit such special places (hence why I write these things).

…In any case, if you visit Guat, this should be on your short-list!
We stayed at Greengo’s, a pleasant eco, yet-springbreak-like hostel, with a pool and overall amazing experience. They respect locals with a lights-out policy, including cutting wifi access and power around 10-11PM – I love it, a lot of people complain about it. Deal with it, you are in the jungle.

Oh, remember those elections?? We were here when they happened. All liquor sales stopped for the weekend, and a large presence of police appeared. Staff was on high-alert as they searched the grounds, and essentially extorted the owner on bribe! I’ll never forget seeing the police duo leaving on a tiny motorcycle, taking the super bumpy ride out two-up…Include real, jungle-made cocao, and our river float gone-wrong experience (nearly losing a girl in the jungle at night), we were so glad to say Semuc Champey, hurray!

Bird Season in Flores and the Tikal Experience

Our final destination in Guatemala was the Flores-and-Tikal tourist package; a worthwhile adventure to see the fantastic lakeside town and experience Mayan civilization at this UNESCO WH site. Arriving at Lago Petén Itzá at sunset was perfect timing to see the small town of Flores coming to life, taking note of where locals had gathered to get grilled carnes and postres galore! We stayed at Los Amigos hostel, having accommodations and tour packages; however, we like to spread the love, and found our own bus trip from another local vender. The best surprise was finding ProPetén next door, spending an hour chatting with Diego about their mission to transform regional agriculture to more ecological methods and prevent further degradation of the Lago (a reoccurring theme throughout my adventures).

Due to some unfortunate stomach issues, our Flores experience was limited to walking the town, meeting many locals and their best food, even making a friend from Belize that we ended up hanging out with a few days later on Caye Caulker! Fortunately, a few days rest healed Sierra’s belly just in time for an early wake-up call in Tikal…

Yes, a jungle wake up roll call requires an early departure. Pay the extra amount and choose this option, which also included a knowledgeable guide to tell the story of Tikal. We arrived at night, seeing plenty of critters curious as to why people were in their home…tread lightly, and quietly! I won’t spoil any surprises, but the awakening of jungle fauna was powerful and humbling. No shortage of critters exists here, including the Tucan and chi’ik (Tejón aka coatimundi) – no they are not pets, and no you shouldn’t feed them!

Once in full light, Tikal was truly a special place to be – a certain energy exists here, an important reminder of Earthly connectedness. At one point being home to an estimated 60,000 Maya around 10,750HE, it is wild to close your eyes and envision this a thriving society. Sadly, much remains speculation as to the ancient Mayan civilization…In retrospect, there is no greater tragedy than the legacy of European monotheism; the Spanish being most notorious in these regions.

While Humanity has made incredible technological strides in our 12,020 years, we must learn from explores of the past by using a lens of the present, and better planning for a future where cultural diversity and preservation is not only respected, but held in the highest regard.

During the Spanish conquest of Mesoamerica in the 16th century, the Catholic Church’s Friar Diego de Landa supervised the burning of hundreds of Maya codices—fig-bark books rich in mythological and astronomical information.
Only four Maya codices are known to have survived.

Goodbye Guat’!

We returned to Flores for one more night to fill our bellies with tacos and banana bread, before hoping on the bus to Belize City. Goodbye Guatemala, we miss you already, and can’t wait to see you again! Here are a few take-aways from our experience.

La Gente de la Ciudad no son el mismo del país…There are many differences between city and country folk, which is not so different than anywhere else! However, this came as a surprise to me after several cantina conversations with domestic tourists from the city. While much of this comes from a cultural (and language) divide between Hispanic and Indigenous / Maya populations, the root cause is similar to societies around the globe: lots of troubling history, combined with perceived social and economic differences, and exclusion. As tourists, all we can do is help break down these barriers, especially if you speak the lingo!

We made the mistake of assuming Mexico and Guatemala would be so similar. In actuality, Mexico is much more comparative to the US than Guat! While these countries do have similarities, most seemingly originate from the dichotomy of Hispanic influence (historic conquest & dominance of Catholicism) with a truly everlasting ‘Maya’ heritage. It is difficult to explain my opinions, so go experience it yourself – and read on from more knowledgeable sources…

‘Unintended’ consequences of The Wall with this, and previous, administration’s handling of a complicated, regional crisis. It became evident that the bordering countries held a similar view as the US border ‘debate’; observing some real animosities between Guat’ and Mexican peoples due to their own border issues. These challenges, existing between many Central American countries, have only become more intense. With recent US rhetoric against immigration and the demands to stop immigration across the US-Mexico border, the pressure has shifted to Mexico to tighten up its policy, cascading effects that create dire situations – not solutions – for The People in Central America.

True travel is not dead. (yet.) We still have the ability – and privilege – to experience foreign cultures and environments in their raw form. Not the Westernized, branded, packaged-up, and sold like a fresh-pressed frozen fruit smoothy. These cultures are alive!; still living with principals that have survived centuries of oppression, manipulation, discrimination, and constant pressure to conform to a standardized form of economy and society. We as nations, with privilege, must do everything we can to see the unique cultures and ecology of the World persevere for the future of Humanity.

Also, the concept of “ending poverty“, through categorization or by giving peoples with extraordinary Human gifts ‘access to micro-loans’ while proliferating their culture with that of consumerism is no solution, in my humble opinion. We can do better.

Robert writes to share his experiences and observations through a lens of curiosity and questioning; why are so many places on Earth facing analogous challenges? how do we leverage nature’s regenerative mechanisms to craft more robust, equitable solutions? Utility² represents a big-picture vision in solving many shared challenges, by modernizing municipal utility services & infrastructure, while empowering community through engagement and cultural resilience in under-served, and developing regions.